Better...

Things today have been better than yesterday.  I went over on my calories for the day again, but I just whipped my ass in ballet instead of taking to the knife.  J texted me this morning and all he said was "I love you, be strong today." I love him so much, I'm so glad that he's in my life, and that he's chosen to forgive me for now.

Much love to Just Me and Astra, your guys' comments made my day a little brighter.  I love you guys.

So there's another guy....I promise that I'm not boy crazy, but being in college now, I have so many more new dating opportunities, so I'm trying not to limit myself.  This guy is the one that I told you about before, who took care of me when I was really drunk and who found out about my problems and wants to help me.  He lives on my floor, and his name starts with an "E", but since I already have a person on here designated to that name, we'll call him W.  He and I don't exactly see eye-to-eye on everything, but I love talking to him.  He's tall, dark hair, a little bit more athletic and muscle-y than my usual type, but he's not bulky, just lean.  He has a habit of walking around our dorm without a shirt on, which I don't complain about *drool*.  Some of the other people on my floor thought he was a little weird at first, but he isn't at all, actually.  He is super energetic and friendly, and he takes care of me.

The other night, when I was really drunk and I was mad that I had drunk so many calories, I was sitting on a couch in our common room just staring at my cuts and scratching at them.  He came in and pulled my hand away and just put his arm around me, stroking my hair and rubbing my shoulders, trying to get me to calm down.  We had a really good talk about life.  Then he started talking to me about how his girlfriend broke up with him now that they're at different schools, but she keeps calling him and telling him that she misses him, she's messing with his head.  When he was telling me about all of this, he put his head in his hands and was tearing up a little bit and I was just so astounded that he felt comfortable enough to tell me that.  Maybe he thought I was too drunk to remember....we haven't talked about it since.  But he is always looking out for me, and I think it was that night that I started developing a little crush.  I don't even know if I'll ever act on it or anything, but I just get really happy when I see him, and I love spending time with him.  I'm not as blatantly attracted to him as with Almond Boy, but we'll see...

I have a paper to finish and a few classes tomorrow, but then I have fall break! All of my friends are going home, except for me, so I'll basically have the entire campus to myself.  That'll be weird.  But I'll figure out ways to occupy my time...

Love you guys, thanks again for the comments <3