Almond Boy

Hello lovelies.

So this was the post that I meant to do about a week or two ago, but since I was still confused about the whole breaking up with E thing, I figured I should cool off a bit before posting this.

There's a boy.

I found a post on "Letters to Crushes" that completely summarizes my feelings:

So maybe I have this teeny tiny microscopic crush on you and I think about you all the time and my heart beats super fast when I see you and people can catch my attention just by saying your name.  Yup, that's right. Nothing serious.

My roommate and I call him Almond Boy, so that's what his name shall be on here.

We met at orientation.  I was sitting on the grass with my roommate, listening to one of the million speeches that we had to go to, and he just sat down next to me, leaned over, and offered me some almonds.  No introduction, just an adorable smile and a little gesture.  I turned towards him and whispered "No, thank you."  I quickly turned back around and introduced myself.  He smiled and told me his name.  He has sparkling hazel eyes, short brown hair, and a facial expression that seems to be somewhere between a smirk and a smile all the time.  We sat in companionable silence for the rest of the presentation.

Later, we had to go to a speech in the chapel, and we coincidentally sat next to each other.  Over the course of the next two hours, we whispered back and forth about everything and nothing, our shoulders occasionally brushing as we leaned in to say something.  At one point, the speaker told us that we needed to move to sit next to someone that we'd never met before.  At this point, he leaned over and said quietly, "I want to stay sitting with you..." I rolled my eyes at him, but made no move to get up as everyone around us shuffled to new seats.  We again went our separate ways, and I didn't see him much for the next day or so, except when we'd occasionally wave and smile to each other in passing.  Then when we ere lining up for convocation, he randomly showed up behind me in line and we started talking.  Unfortunately, due to the number of seats in each row, he couldn't sit next to me, which was "quite a shame" according to him.  I don't think I've ever been so hyper aware of someone else's presence before.  It's addicting, way more than I ever felt with E.  I didn't see him for a few days, and then one day I shoed up to dinner, and he was eating with the two friends I was joining.  Again, conversation ensued; but then he had to go.  But as he started walking away, he noticed my tattoo and came back to ask me about it, like what inspired it.  I told him it was a long story, and he smiled and said, "You can tell me about it later." Then he left.

Ran into him again about a week later, and he asked to have dinner with me.  I was already eating with my friends, so he joined us, and it was really nice.  Guys, I really like this guy.  I wasn't allowed to admit it when I first met him during orientation because I was technically still with E.  He was part of the reason I broke up with E...not because I thought I'd have a better shot with Almond Boy, but because I figured that if I could fall that hard for a guy after just a couple of conversations with him, I must not be as infatuated with E as I thought, and it wouldn't be fair to him to stay together when I was clearly falling for someone else....

Stupid boys.  I don't know what emotion is stronger; fear that when I finally see Almond Boy again, he wont really care; annoyance with myself (and him) that we didn't exchange numbers; pure attraction...I don't know, but I'm a jumble of crazy emotions right now.

I am losing weight noticeably now.  I was in ballet class, and my arms are starting to get that thin toned look again...I almost jumped for joy.

My friend A saw that I was posting on a blog, and now he's trying to find it....He was going to ask my sister what it was called, but she doesn't know that I still post on here (I told her awhile ago that I deleted it).  I pretty much had to steal his computer to keep him from sending her a Facebook message.  But I doubt he'll find it. I guess we'll see...

I had something else that I wanted to tell you guys, but I'm forgetting right now.

I love you all, thank you for listening to my mindless ramblings.  Especially when I go off about a boy like that.

Let me hear your voices, I really need a reminder more than ever that I'm not rambling into cyberspace.