Back from Russia

Hello loves,

I just got back from my trip to Russia and I am so jet lagged.   I came home and slept for 14 hours with the intention of just taking a one hour nap. Oops.

I couldn't eat anything in Russia, it was ridiculous.  I mean, I haven't been eating much at all recently because I'm in such an emotional turmoil that I tipped back over the edge, but I would usually have an apple for breakfast and a salad for dinner.  No lunch.  I had learned to work my routine to my advantage.  But in Russia, I had absolutely no control.  None.  Our group leader would take us to restaurants where they would just keep bringing out random food, fried with potatoes and meat and cream and fatfatfat, and I'm not going to lie, I freaked out.  I had to get up and leave the table more than once on this trip.  My roommate got a little worried, but she is such a bitch and I really didn't feel like talking to her about my issues.  She's one of those people who is super fake and tries to be nice to your face, but you know that as soon as you leave the room she'll be trash talking you.  I hate people like that.  My one friend on the trip did try to walk me through eating while I was there, but there were just too many options that I refused to even look at, so she eventually gave up.  I apologized later to her, because I know she was just trying to help.  But I had absolutely no control over the situation, so I was feeling defensive.  I definitely lost weight on the trip, on the plus side.....

Oh, more news about E.  I told him that I like him (it was a much more articulate way of saying that, but that was the gist of it), and he told me he was flattered.  And that he thought I was wonderful.  And he wants to spend time with me this summer, and hopefully next year too.  He doesn't care that we're going to different schools.

Yeah, cue me falling just a little farther for this guy.

I will probably get to post more, now that I'll just be living with my mom and not my whole family.  We'll see.  I always forget how much I love talking to you guys, it's so wonderful to know that I have support no matter what.  I love you all, you are my stability right now.